Well.
It seems it's come to that time.
The time to go to work in the morning.
I mean I should be excited, right? I'm getting paid finally.
But, I'm not terribly excited, you see. I'm nervous.
I'm frightened. I've got anxiety. I'm nauseated. I am scared.
I don't know anyone I'm working for. I don't have a fantastic working track record, or ethic.
I'm worried.
I feel like a lost boy.
It feels like the first day of college again.
I want to cry. I want to cry hard.
What if it doesn't go well, and I get fired?
What if the bosses are huge dicks, and it makes my life hell?
I don't want to go to work tomorrow. I really, really don't.
But the bottom line, is that I have to. And I will go. Up at 6, off just after 7, and work at 8.
I'm not comfortable. This is out of my comfort zone. But I suppose there's a quote out there about that...
Hmm...
I believe it's said by Neale Donald Walsch, an american christian author...
"Life begins where your comfort zone ends"
And boy, am I uncomfortable. I wished, and prayed for so long to get a well-paying job, and now I've landed one.
So why does it feel so scary and wrong?
These songs, this music, this man. Seem to be calming my nerves.
I am truly afraid of what tomorrow will bring. I don't want to go to bed.
But It' getting later, and later, as I type, and I type.
I can feel it approaching...
The time to go to sleep...
or try to...
Deep breath in...
and out..
and in...
out...
