It's 1:30 am and I can't seem to sleep.
I've even put a melatonin in my system and that's not doing the trick.
Maybe it's because I have a lot I'm thinking about, which is why I'll give blogging a try.
It's helped in the past and maybe will now.
I have to be up at 6 to drive Dad to the Calgary Airport.
I'm so thankful for dad, he came with me on my drive to Calgary just spontaneously and he stayed with me for a couple days. I am now worried about his flight, because I apparently think the worst.
And then, worry.
I've prayed to God. (2017 is the year I own up to my Christian Identification) I talked to Him about my troubles and anxiety.
I'm worried for dad's safety tomorrow.
I'm also lonely in Calgary, I'm fully living on my own, I don't have anyone across the hall, or down the street that I remotely know. It's weirding me out.
I am having female issues, I become absolutely obsessed with women, I don't just like them, or am interested, I full on think about them and scheme and plan and dream until it ruins all my chances I may or may not have had. I like someone I know, and am wanting to ask her out, but am afraid it won't be right or she'll turn me down. Yet, I can't seem to be able to forget about her for 2 seconds. It's someone new at least, rather than the person I've struggled to get over.
Getting a job also seems to be a tricky thing, I am only around for 2 months, one of which I won't be around for 60% of it. Money is becoming a major burden. And it's stressing me out.
Rehearsals are not helping me due to the fact that I did very little over the Christmas Holiday to prepare for it, I am planning this week to study hard and make this my best role to date, but some wrist slapping and a shameful overhang isn't helping for the moment.
Anyway, We are caught up, I'm going to try to sleep now. Best of luck internet.
X O X O
G.
