Back again.
This feels like therapy in it's own right. Right here.
I think I'll frequent my blog more often this year... and I think that's not a bad thing.
The first day of 2016 has now come and gone. And...
It was pretty up and down. Pros and cons. Always I suppose.
I lost my mind today and had to just de-stress intensely in my room after hanging out with my family and grandmothers.
I was super tired all day from the party last night.
However, day one of three hundred and sixty five and it was porn free. YES.
You know, I started this entry withholding great sadness and sorrow. I now feel blessed, and relatively ok. I have a good year to look forward to. It's going to be busy and hard. But I can do it if I work HARD. And I know I can. I need to overcome my lazy nature and just work my handsome, hairy ass off.
I've been reading some other blogs, and they are written by beloved friends, I enjoy reading into their lives. And knowing what they are thinking in the moment. Sometimes it's difficult to read and sometimes it's heartwarming. I have to realize that I am one of the only ones that can choose how I feel and how I see the world.
I can't change the world around me. I can only change myself, and hope with the best of my ability that I make a difference in the occasional harsh reality that is life.
I should be a lot more grateful for what I have than what I give credit for. I am in 3 shows in the next 6 months and that's AMAZING! AND they are all major roles. I couldn't be more blessed, especially with the typecast I was born with, this wasn't expected. Thank you Lord.
I am infatuated with two people right now and that's such a blessing. Honestly. I may not be in a relationship but who says that give you happiness. Even feeling happy when I think or daydream over what could be. It's such a powerful way to increase mood.
I have the privilege of loving everyone I meet and grow around. Sure, it's hard to say goodbye or it's hard to live with someone, but I love them and hopefully they love me. And for that, I couldn't ask for more.
I am scared for this year. But as much as I am unsure, it excites me to know that anything could happen.
I received a text this morning that changed my morning and it was beautiful, it was from a friend that does nothing but cares for their friends, it said:
"Happy New Year! I hope you achieve all that you've ever dreamed with the love you deserve"
Blown. Away.
I was truly thankful for it.
Before I finish this entry, here's a blurb from Neil Gaiman:
"May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness. I hope you read some fine books and kiss someone who thinks you're wonderful, and don't forget to make some art - write or draw or build or sing or live as only you can. And I hope, somewhere in the next year, you surprise yourself."
I have a long drive tomorrow. I hope it's well, and I have to say bye to my family for five months, it'll be hard.
With all the optimism I can muster, with all the hope I contain... Blessings (Geordie, listen up)
You will be fine.
